To Spit or Swallow

So…I just licked spit off a tootsie roll pop. No…it’s okay…it was mine.

I’m not sure what happened to Monday…this week it just came and went. This weekend was cool though. I hung out with my friend, Michael in Springs. Saturday night we went to a sushi bar. For the most part, it was cool. Michael made several good sushi selections from the menu…I think it was me who wanted to try the sea urchin…or uni, I think it’s called. No…I definitely,KNOW...it’s called uni. That three letter word is imbedded in my memory for all time. Especially, if I’m ever with someone having sushi and I want to gross them out…I’ll be like, “Have you tried uni? It’s like an orgasm in your mouth.” Then I can tell them,”So…you spit?" or "Oh, you swallow?"

I have never really felt like vomiting at the dinner table…and then feeling like I already did and it was in my mouth. I vow never again to eat something that I don’t have the foggiest idea what it looks, smells or tastes like without having a container or paper napkin to spit in.

In trying to describe what uni tastes like and feels like in your mouth, only a few things come to mind…sampling baby poop; eating the contents of an old pus-filled pimple on a biker’s back…or like when you’re really sick with a bronchial or sinus infection, and hawking up a chunk of mucus and then saying, ”Oh, that looks good…maybe I’ll eat that.”

Even more disgusting is that I consumed it. I swear…I looked for a place to spit it. Michael offered me a cloth napkin. I just couldn’t bring myself to move the uni from the back part of my tongue to the front without having to taste it again. I felt like I couldn’t go forward, yet couldn’t go back. It was fucking traumatizing.